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'The human connection' - Why foreigners love France's bonjour habit

The Local France
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'The human connection' - Why foreigners love France's bonjour habit
Photo by Jonathan NACKSTRAND / AFP

The importance of greetings - especially bonjour - in France is something that often surprises newcomers. But once they're got into the habit, do foreigners in France like it? Or find it annoying? We asked our readers.

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It's pretty common for foreigners in France to have a story about the time they forgot a bonjour after arriving in France - and were generally either ignored or reprimanded until they offered the correct greeting.

Greetings are hugely important in France, and forgetting your bonjour can mean the difference between good service and bad, or making friends or being ignored.

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READ ALSO 11 everyday situations when you will need to use bonjour

If you live here, you generally end up accepting this because it will make your life easier - but once they have acclimatised, do foreigners enjoy their new habit? Or is it a chore or even mildly annoying to be constantly greeting people?

We asked our readers and our Twitter poll was extremely conclusive - 93.9 percent of respondents said they like the bonjour tradition. 

 

Many readers also shared their comments on their new habits.

Ronald G Kirchem said: "I adore the formal politeness of the French. It makes life much more enjoyable."

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Chris Hobday concurred, saying: "Je l'adore ! At a local café I am greeted by the very proper proprietress with a nod of the head and "Bonjour monsieur", at a nearby resto with a handshake and "Bonjour ! ça va?" from a wisecracking waiter, and from the young serveuse at the wine bar, "Bonjour, Chris", and "bisous".

American Diana Chambers told us: "I LOVE French politesse - the human connection."

The human connection was mentioned a lot when we previously spoke to French people about why bonjour is so important. Especially for people working in retail or service - a greeting acknowledges them as a person, rather than just a machine there to serve your needs.

READ ALSO Why Bonjour is the most important word in the French language

The friends and family of John MacNeil Allison benefit from excellent advice, as he told us: "I'm a fan. It’s the first tip I give fellow Americans visiting France who, like me, have limited French language skills - it gets every interaction off to right start, shows common courtesy."

And several respondents said that they wished that their home countries had similar courtesies in place.

Linda H Matthews said: "I love that everyone acknowledges each other, even in the doctor's waiting room, and the ados who hang around the bus stop. Too much sociability has been lost in my birth country."

We struggled to find anyone who didn't like it, but a few people added some caveats to the habit.

Scheenagh Harrington pointed out: "The only time I ever found it mildly irksome was when I briefly tried jogging and people expected me to be able to talk AND breathe at the same time. 

"Otherwise it's excellent. I find it amazing that people fronting shops say it even when they're hip-deep in customers."

Gregory Viscusi said: "It's moderately annoying when you enter a room of 20 people and you're expected to greet every one individually. But as for when you walk into a shop or to a teller, absolutely the right thing to do. Drives me nuts to see my fellow Americans barge into a place and start bossing."

Several people also recommended the book The Bonjour Effect: Secret codes of French conversation by Jean-Benoît Nadeau and Julie Barlow for further reading.

So there you have it - France, foreigners love your formal greetings. 

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