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Whistles to condoms: French election candidates branch out into merchandise

Sam Bradpiece
Sam Bradpiece - [email protected]
Whistles to condoms: French election candidates branch out into merchandise
French election merchandise anyone? (Photo by Christophe SIMON / AFP)

For those truly invested in the French presidential race, simply casting a vote might not be enough - instead there is a wide range of branded merchandise from the candidates. Here is our pick of the strangest offerings.

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The parties all have their ranges and other unofficial sellers have also been cashing in, with the result that you can now buy a wide range of French election momentos, from socks and T-shirts to frisbees and condoms.

Here is our pick of some of the weirder pieces of 2022 election memorabilia:

Faites Zemmour pas la guerre t-shirt

Eric Zemmour's team are selling t-shirts emblazoned with the words Faites Zemmour pas la guerre

This is a play on words with the expression Faites l'amour pas la guerre ("Make love not war"). 

Considering that the far-right candidate has vowed to increase the defence budget to €70 billion by 2030 and further develop France's nuclear arsenal, the text is somewhat ironic. 

There's also the fact that French investigative website Mediapart has reported on eight woman testifying to having suffered inappropriate behaviour and sexual assault by Zemmour between 1999-2019.

Zemmour began a romantic relationship with his chief campaign adviser, Sarah Knafo, in 2021 - despite being married. 

 

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Le Pen whistle

Marine Le Pen, another far right challenger to the incumbent Emmanuel Macron also has a wide range of bizarre merchandise. 

On her party's website, you can buy Rassemblement National-branded pétanque balls, bluetooth headphones and coffee cups. 

You can also purchase a 2022 calendar full of pictures of Marine Le Pen (not saucy ones) and an alert whistle inscribed with the words Français Reveillez-vous (Wake up France). 

 

Candidate-themed socks 

A store called Chaussettes et Compagnie, based in Lille, has capitalised on selling socks with pictures of the candidates printed above the ankle. 

A pair costs €13 and you are able to choose between masked and unmasked candidates. 

"Socks, like the vote, are useful," reads the company website. 

"The disenchantment of the French with politics is growing. It is time to make it less anxiety-provoking and lighter." 

 

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Taubira jackets 

Christiane Taubira, a former French Justice Minister, failed to collect enough signatures of support to even make it onto the ballot paper, withdrawing her candidacy in early March.

This was bad news for tailors in the West African country of Ivory Coast, who had clearly poured considerable effort into making suit jackets, trousers and face masks in support of the would-be candidate. 

 

Historic prints of Anne Hidalgo's grand statement

The left-wing French newspaper Libération is selling archived copies of its February 4th issue for €5. 

Anne Hidalgo who is competing in the race as the socialist party claims to be the "legitimate candidate" to represent the left on the front page of the paper. 

The French left is catastrophically divided as the first round approaches and Hidalgo is polling at about 2 percent - behind other left-wing figures like Jean-Luc Mélenchon, Yannick Jadot and even the Communist candidate Fabien Roussel. 

Hidalgo's claim to be the legitimate candidate to unite the left is looking increasingly farcical. 

 

 

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High end 

The Elysée Palace, where French Presidents live, has its own boutique

The goods it currently sells are largely banal symbols of French culture - Elysée-branded bags, Elysée tea, Elysée candles and wide variety of other home goods. 

But a fair chunk of the stock represents an hommage to Macron. You can buy posters of the President for €9.90 or a stuffed toy version of the president's dog (Nemo) for €99. 

There are also T-shirts featuring Macron's famous silhouette from his celebration of France's 2018 Football World Cup win or some of the President's trademark phrases like poudre de perlimpinpin.

It is unlikely that the site will offer goods with some of his other quips like when he said he wanted to emmerder the unvaccinated or described his fellow countrymen as fainéants (lazy),  gens qui ne sont rien (nobodies), or Gaulois réfractaires (Gauls who are resistant to change).

 

One week after Macron first launched the Elysée store in 2018, a parody site called Enlysée boutique was set up, selling goods that poke fun at the President. 

 

 

 

Fight for the right to party

Finally, no round up of strange French electoral mementos would be complete without mentioning the communist frisbee sold by Fabien Roussel. 

For just €5 plus €3 postage you can buy one of these plastic disks with the candidate's campaign slogan, Le défi des Jours Heureux ("the challenge of happy days"), written on it. Roussel's campaign is also selling earrings, lighters and condoms.

The revolution sounds like it is going to be a party. 

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